Friends and relatives are often the first people we turn to for help with our problems. Talking things through with them can be really helpful.
People who find it hard to talk to others often write their thoughts in a diary, poem or letter first. This can help to make sense of their thoughts and how they feel, before getting help.
Help from teachers and other school staff
Teachers are there to help pupils get the most out of school. They can be a good person for you to speak to about any problems you have.
If you're missing lessons to help look after someone at home, or struggling to get your work in on time, talk to a teacher about what you do at home so that they can understand what is happening and give you more help.
As a young Carer, you might find school a place where you can forget about your caring responsibilities and feel "normal" for a while. But it can also be a place where you're under extra pressure or where people don't understand what your life is like outside school. It can sometimes be hard to juggle all your responsibilities as a young Carer with the demands of teachers, friends and homework.
Keeping up-to-date with school work
You might not want your school to know you're caring for someone. But if they don't know about your situation, it will be difficult for teachers to understand if you struggle to keep up in class or don't do your homework. It's a good idea to let at least one teacher you feel able to trust know you're a Carer.
You might find it difficult to talk about your home life with a teacher, so you could ask someone in your family to write a letter to the school, perhaps to the head of year. Some young Carers find it easier to talk about the situation if they keep a diary or a list of all the jobs and tasks they have to do.
If you're having trouble with school or homework, your teachers may offer:
- extra time for school work when you have to give more help to the the person you care for
- help for your parents to travel to parents' evenings if they have trouble leaving the house
- to talk to you privately about your home life
- homework clubs
Support at school
There are lots of ways your school can help. You could be allowed to use a phone during breaks and lunchtime so you can check on the person you're looking after.
The school could also put you in touch with your local young Carers service, or get a young carers worker to talk to you. Some schools run lunchtime groups or homework support groups for young carers. If your school doesn't do this, you could suggest it to your teachers.
Nobody wants to get into trouble at school. If teachers know you're a Carer, they may be more sympathetic to your problems (such as lateness), but it won't necessarily stop you being disciplined if you break the rules. If you are given detention, you could ask to have it during lunchtime rather than after school because of your caring responsibilities.
Missing school
You may feel you have to miss school to care for someone. But missing school can affect your whole future. It's important you get help as quickly as possible so the situation doesn't go on for a long time.
The family doctor (GP), nurse, a social worker or other people whose job is to help the person you look after should be able to organise more support at home to help you concentrate on school or college.
Friends and your social life
As a young Carer, you may miss out on opportunities to play and spend time with your friends and classmates. You may feel isolated from your friends because:
- you don't have as much free time as them because you have to spend more time at home
- you're often thinking about the person you look after
- you may be worried they will bully you
Being a young Carer can make you stand out from other people, or you may find that you don't get included in certain activities.
It's important to get the help you need so that you have time to do the things you want to do and be with your friends. If possible, put aside some time each day to do something you enjoy. Your local young Carers project or carers centre may be able to help.
Article provided by NHS Choices